| Support and Getting
Help
How
you might feel
It is important to know
that what happened to you was not your fault and you are not to blame
no matter how the situation occurred. Rape and sexual abuse are acts
of control and/or violence.
You did not want or ask
for the incident to happen and therefore it was non-consensual. The
law does not require there to be any physical resistance in order to
prove it was non-consensual.
You may have been
threatened physically or emotionally, you may have been asleep or
unconscious, or your body may have just frozen rendering you helpless
to do anything about what was happening to you. You may have known and
trusted the person that did this to you so you were lulled into a
sense of security until you realised what was happening.
Even if you were
flirting/kissing/petting and more with the person it does not give
them the right to carry on if you say no. NO MEANS NO.
Many people who have
experienced sexual violence blame themselves and look back at the
incident to find ways they could have escaped the situation and
question why they reacted the way they did at the time. It is easy to
look back and think logically now you are out of the situation but at
the time you were most likely crippled by your emotions. It is
impossible to predict what might happen to us and there was no way you
could have foreseen what happened to you.
Every situation is
unique and although your feelings are individual to you, they are
experienced by many people who have suffered sexual violence.
People can experience a
number of different feelings. These could include:
A sense of being numb
-
Anger
-
Confusion
-
Self blame/guilt
-
Feeling strangely calm
-
Fear/anxiety
-
Loss of control
-
Disbelief
These are just a few
examples of what may be experienced. Feelings are likely to change as
time passes, and what happened may affect a person for the rest of
their life. It is never too late to get help for what you have been
through. It may feel overwhelming and confusing about what to do next.
What
to do & What your Options are
If you have recently
been assaulted consider reporting it to the police by calling them
directly.
If you live in
Merseyside you have the option to go to your local Sexual Assault
Referral Centre (SAFEPlace Merseyside) and one will be opening in
Cheshire in 2010.
To find out more
information and if the area you live in has a SARC use this link:
http://www.rapecrisis.org.uk/reportingrape/referralcentres.html
At the SARC they will be
able to advise you on pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections as
well as offering to forensically examining you to preserve evidence
even if you are undecided about reporting to the police.
RASASC works in
partnership with SAFEPlace Merseyside to deliver outreach Independent
Sexual Violence Advisor (ISVA) support and counselling. You can get
emotional support, independent advice and access counselling services
through Independent Sexual Violence Advisors (ISVAs) whether you
decide to report the incident or not. The ISVA can also support you to
report the incident and go through the criminal justice system (see
services for a list of what RASASC can provide).
You can contact
RASASC (in office hours) to get more information and advice on any of
the issues talked about in this section.
Historical abuse and reporting
If the incident/s
occurred some time ago AND/OR if you are a survivor of childhood
sexual abuse
Reporting the incident/s
You may want to report
the incident/s to the police and the following points may help when
thinking about what to do:
It
is entirely your decision if you want to report what happened to you,
the police are there to listen to you and act on what you tell them.
It
is the police’s job to protect the public.
v
The police
investigate what you tell them and then it is the Crown Prosecution
Service (CPS)
www.cps.gov.uk that decides whether to take the case any further.
Even if there is little evidence it may be taken to court if there is
a concern for public safety.
v
It may be
your account that helps stop a perpetrator repeating their actions -
if they have done it once they are likely to do it again.
Your
story could be a missing piece in a much larger picture that helps
catch the perpetrator, even if you do not know who they were.
v
Sometimes
when one person comes forward about an incident it encourages more
people to come forward and say that the same thing happened to them.
This is often the case when a person has been abused as a child and
was not aware that their siblings were also abused by the same person
until it is revealed in later life.
v
Some
people find it helps their healing process
v
The
Independent Sexual Violence Advisor (ISVA) can support you all the way
through the criminal justice system (see services).
v
There are
special measures in place to help victims of sexual violence in the
criminal justice system feel as safe and comfortable as possible.
If you decide that
reporting the incident is not an option for you or if you have already
been through that process or the perpetrator has died you may want to
access counselling. There are many counselling services available (see
the links page) or contact RASASC to get information on where to
access counselling local to you. RASASC provides a free counselling
service (see services).
You can contact
RASASC (in office hours) to get more information and advice on any of
the issues talked about in this section.
Some Useful Contacts
National Association for
People Abused in Childhood (helpline weekdays and evenings) 0800 085
3330 www.napac.org.uk
Victim Support (help and advice if you have been a victim of a crime.
They can also help you apply for compensation) 0845 30 30 900
www.victisupport.org.uk
FOR MORE INFORMATION ON
OTHER SUPPORT SERVICES AVAILABLE PLEASE CLICK ON LINKS
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